The Ten Commandments: #4

Hey folks! As we begin our journey through Lent, our kids are transitioning into a series of lessons about the Ten Commandents.

The Ten Commandments and the moral vision they espouse form the foundation of Christian moral teaching. With a little consideration one can see this everywhere, from the way we think about worship, to the way we think about the value of human life, humility, jealousy, and so on.

Read our introduction to the Ten Commandments (along with a bit about the first commandment) here.

Of the “Ten Words” God gives to his people, there are but two that are positively stated, while the rest are negations: “do not…” etc. etc. The fourth commandment is one of the two positively stated commands: “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.” (Ex. 20:12). 

This is perhaps a strange command at first glance, because it is so particular, so specific, and so concrete. The first three commands are of course not vague, but here with the third command (and for the remainder of the commandments) the tone transitions from the love of God to the love of neighbor (cf. Matt. 22). And it begins with giving honor to one’s parents. 

One the one hand, this is natural, since, whatever the actual moral quality of our parents or however well or not well they performed raising us, they did in fact provide the necessary material for our existence. We quite literally owe our life to them. All of who we are comes from them, even though we can and often are so emphatically different from them. They are nevertheless due honor—and this is very personal—from us as individuals. 

On the other hand, this is extremely unnatural, because our parents, being human, are imperfect. And while we are all responsible for our selves and the choices we make, it is the case that we inherit many of our parents’ pathologies: generational disfunction, personal imperfections, etc.

This is certainly one of the bewildering things about being a parent; we know we will cause pain in our children’s lives no matter how hard we try not to. And so we all have an instinct to vilify our parents for this, to dismiss and disregard them and their imperfections as we try to make our own way in the world.

But this is as immature a response as receiving all of our parents’ instruction uncritically. Parents are human beings, and (in most cases), deeply committed to our welfare. 

Of course, there are some instances in which parents fail severely, and those cases need to treated accordingly. But those tragic failures as tragic themselves “prove the rule” of honor as the normative posture for a child to parent. 

And here we catch a glimpse of how the Law is intended to make us more human (and therefore more alive to the world): to see our parents as imperfect, yes, but yet those to whom we quite literally owe everything. 

Scripture to consider:

• Exodus 20:12

• Luke 2:41-52

  
  

Question for your kids

• How did Jesus know so much about God and the Scriptures at such a young age? (see Luke 2:41-52 above)

• Why would Jesus obey his parents when he knew he was God in the flesh?

Peace,

Danny+